All of us experience fear in some way. For example, fear of being alone, fear of not having control, or fear of not being in control. Fear of being seen in a certain way. Fear of emotional discomfort. Fear of death.
Then we have this response to fear. For example, the fear of being alone might cause worried thoughts. Another response we might have to our fears is avoiding certain situations. So if you have a fear of not being in control and not being able to control circumstances, then a reaction might be to not go on a vacation. Because when you we go on a vacation, there's a lot of.
Another response that we might have to fear is that our nervous systems might get activated. We might go into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. For example, being vulnerable with a therapist, being vulnerable with a friend, public speaking, this can cause you to trigger your nervous system.
Another response to fear might be, it can make you do things that aren't good for you. A fear of emotional discomfort, such as feeling grief might cause us to go to food, we might go to alcohol, or we might go to some type of unhealthy sexual encounter.
However, these are all responses to the fear and not fear itself. We have the fear and then we have this response. And I like to think that the response is optional. But the fear is something we can sit with and meditate on. The more we sit in acceptance of our fear the more we feel at ease with it and can actually get to a point of calm. Learning a mindfulness practice or working with a mindfulness coach is a wonderful way to move into this acceptance.
Listen to the episode on The Aware Mind podcast.